This year has been quite a whirlwind year. In the space of just nine months I moved away from home, met new people and made new friends, began a degree, got a job, realised I had chosen the wrong course, applied for a new uni, completed a year’s worth of coursework…and now I’m about to go home again.
As I sit in my half-bare university bedroom for one of my last days here, I can’t help but replay the year. I have just packed my suitcase and in a couple of days’ time I’ll be back home. I’m looking forward to going home – I’ve not had much to do these last few weeks, with my course finishing (extremely) early, I’ve been pretty bored to say the least. But the end of the year for me feels a lot different to how it must feel for other first years.
The end of my first year means the end of my time at this particular university. The end of living with these friends, the end of sitting with my course friends every week. It’s an odd sensation – I’m leaving again, after only leaving school last year. It’s like I’m about to start the next chapter in my life…again. And a big part of me is so excited for it. When I think about next year I can’t help but smile. My course sounds wonderful, the societies sound really fun, and I’ll be honest I’m looking forward to living in a bigger city again. I’ll meet new people! I really enjoy making new friends, it’ll be fun to have that experience again.
But another part of me can’t help but feel…nostalgic. No, I haven’t been here very long. But it has been a huge learning curve for me. I know myself better – I know what I need to be happy; I know how I want to change for the better; and I’m much more confident than I ever have been. I’ve had some wonderful times at university. I’ve had some not-so-great ones too, but that’s part of life. I’ve learnt a lot more about people that I could have at home. And I’m going to miss this familiar setting; the views; the brand new bedroom; the people.
It’s a strange situation. I’m so excited for next year! But part of me feels really…silent at the thought of leaving for good on Sunday. It’s like the reality of the choice I’ve made has finally settled itself into my brain. I’m leaving – this is it. It almost feels bigger than it did when I left school.
I’m ready to move on. Although this course/university was the wrong choice for me, it was the right choice in a completely different way. I’ve enjoyed my first year, and I’ve had experiences that have and will make me a better person. Now, I can sit back and relax, and let second year roll on, full steam ahead. I wonder how that will work out.
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